A Prayer for the Atheists

I was confronted by a person in my graduating class asking me if I would offer a opening and closing prayer for the graduation ceromony we are having this May. But....they said....there are rules:
1. You have to have your prayer written and approved by the school staff
2. You can't use the name "Jesus" (maybe I couldn't use God either i can't remember)

Well I said I would have to think about it but my answer would probably be no since that is nothing but a poem, not a prayer. I mean if I am not saying Jesus then who is my prayer going to?
So I thought of this little "ditty" as my "Prayer for the Atheists"

-Our father, whether it be Mother Earth or King Kong's ancestor, which may or may not be in a celestial body above our own,
-Hallowed be thy name that we will not speak.
-Thy kingdom come in a mutually beneficial way for all.
-Thy will be done as long as it dosn't infringe upon anyones rights.
-GIVE US THIS DAY OUR DAILY BREAD! Just as long as it is a free, and tax deductible gift.
-And forgive us our debts, please.
-Lead us not into temptation unless it is really the persons free choice to partake in it,
and deliver us from "evil" as defined by a persons choice to a different path than a "good" person and is neither wrong nor right.
-For thine is the kingdom as long as it is in accord with Seperation of Church and State,
-And the power as long as it isn't exerted on the weaker man,
-And the glory as long it is shared equally among all people,
-For ever, or as long as desired by the majority,
(Culturally accepted affirmation inserted here)